"I'm sorry. I'm not getting frustrated at you, I promise. I'm just... I remember some of the bad stuff. Like, it's hazy and I guess it's more just a consciousness of how bad I'm feeling with it but I hate that I remember that but not so much you there helping me. It pisses me off because you do so much for me and I feel like I'm leaving you to fly blind with it all. Which is so fucking dumb, I know. Beyond dumb. It's not like I can control my dumbfuck brain injury or the seizures. But the bad ones are definitely worse when they happen from what you're saying, so this feeling like I'm getting worse, it's not just all in my head and making a big deal out of nothing?" Jace searched his husband's face and when he saw the exhaustion staring back at him written all over Jesse, he touched his cheek and then cupped his hand behind Jesse's head to invite him into a soft but lingering kiss. After it, he caressed his thumb over Jesse's cheek, their foreheads resting together. "I hate hat you can't even escape being a nurse at home. When we got married, I knew there'd be those occasional times I'd had really bad ones but not as often as they are now. Maybe we can hire, like, a home nurse for those times so it's not all on you and Evan...?" He hated asking it. It hurt. But he didn't know how else to help.
He nodded and wrapped his arms around Jesse. "I can do extra cuddles. I can give you backrubs or draw you a bubble bath. I can snuggle with you in bed while you rest. Remember one of our first dates after I'd had a seizure and was feeling a bit rough, so we couldn't go out like we planned and you built me an amazing pillow fort in the living room? We watched our favourite movies and just lay in there together. Maybe we need to do that again, for you this time? Ask for some time off work, yeah? We can play it by ear but I want you to take some time off to really rest properly and switch off. Otherwise, you're going to be so burnt out, you get really sick. I want to know I can nurse you the same way you nurse me, but I can't and that hurts so fucking much."
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He nodded and wrapped his arms around Jesse. "I can do extra cuddles. I can give you backrubs or draw you a bubble bath. I can snuggle with you in bed while you rest. Remember one of our first dates after I'd had a seizure and was feeling a bit rough, so we couldn't go out like we planned and you built me an amazing pillow fort in the living room? We watched our favourite movies and just lay in there together. Maybe we need to do that again, for you this time? Ask for some time off work, yeah? We can play it by ear but I want you to take some time off to really rest properly and switch off. Otherwise, you're going to be so burnt out, you get really sick. I want to know I can nurse you the same way you nurse me, but I can't and that hurts so fucking much."