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[3forthepriceof1]

When one of your kids passes out twice in an hour, you have to resist the urge to call paramedics, SWAT and possibly the military for back up to make sure they're okay.

Comments

[aussielawyer]

Hey, what's going on, hon? What kid?

[3forthepriceof1]

Zoran. My god, it's a really long story. I don't even know all of it.

[aussielawyer]

Um, Zoran?

[3forthepriceof1]

Zed's real name is Zoran. When he came to us, it was Witness Protection. They made him change his name and his whole identity. Now he's going through some really awful traumas. He's not doing well.

[aussielawyer]

Fuck. Are you okay? Is there anything I can do for any of you?

[3forthepriceof1]

No. I'm not. You understand, when your kid is hurting beyond hell in ways you can't help them. We just need to get through this somehow. It's hard without all the information.

[aussielawyer]

I do know. I know how much it hurts. Is he sick or just traumatised? I know the moment Justin becomes emotionally taxed, it's a very rapid domino effect.

[3forthepriceof1]

He's both. He's stressed, and the HIV news is looming. His biological father was murdered.

[aussielawyer]

It's not easy, Heather. When you don't have the answers, you feel completely helpless and you feel like you're making it worse for them because you can't help them. It's your job as a parent to, but you can't. Is he getting counselling?

[3forthepriceof1]

How do you do it? How do you survive? Heart issues aside. I know it's not as black and white as that. He's been having therapy since he came to us. Talking about things is part of the problem at the moment. He said he's reliving everything.

[aussielawyer]

Some days, I don't really think I do. There's no real formula. No matter what you do, it's still painful as all shit to see them hurting. And that's okay. It took Justin many, many months to begin to open up to me about the hardest things he had been through. Even then, I know I don't know it all. But you realise you don't need to.

[3forthepriceof1]

Did it keep coming like a hard blow every time he revealed something? I have to keep remembering he's an adult, but he's also a very vulnerable one right now, and weak. It's still okay for me to be his mom, right? Would he tell me if he didn't want me to be?

[aussielawyer]

Every single time. Maybe he is an adult, but even adults still need their parents. I still need mine. The only time my kid has ever told me to fuck off out of his face was when he was psychotic. We're the ones who are supposed to just know they need us without them needing to ask. Does it feel like he doesn't need you?

[3forthepriceof1]

I know that was a terrible day for you, love. Zoran's never told any of us to fuck off. Not even close. No, it doesn't feel like that. In fact, he came to me because he needed us.

[aussielawyer]

It was a shock at the time it was happening, but I soon accepted that it wasn't Justin. Now I've seen him psychotic a few times. He's not there. He doesn't remember after it either. In my experience, if they cry out to you when they need you, it means they need you most of all.

[3forthepriceof1]

How as his psychosis been recently? Is it controlled now? I think that's what happened. He came to find me, and next thing I knew he was just pouring his heart out to me. Not that he hasn't talked to me about things since we had him, but this was different. This was things he needed to hide for a very long, from everyone.