Jace didn't answer immediately. Not because he didn't want to but sometimes, heavier and more emotional subjects, he needed longer to process his thoughts or what someone was saying to him. He finished off his piece of garlic pizza, leaving most of the crust, which he discarded on a spare napkin while his other hand fidgeted with his fork. Even then, with some time to let what Jesse asked sink in and percolate a bit, he still wasn't sure exactly what he was feeling. "I-- I don't..." He stopped, scrunching his face up a little and then looked back to Jesse with a small sigh of frustration at himself. Although it was a simple enough question, if was about a massive, scary subject matter he had never really known how to work through. Even with therapists or doctors, he usually just ended up getting frustrated and crying. More than a decade since he was hit by a car and got the brain injury, some parts of it were still very raw. Probably always would be. Jesse knew that. It was why he was being tender and gentle trying to navigate it. "I don't know if it's any of that. I think it's just... um... I think I'm just angry at myself when I'm sick. That kind of what it feels like after a seizure. I think I thought I'd be more... better by now. Not getting worse. And I think I'm getting worse. A bit. I feel like a patient with Ev when I'm sick. I hate being reminded I'm a patient. It's not anything he does. But I just want to be his little brother." He shrugged because he didn't even know if he was making sense.

Slipping his arm around Jesse's waist, he snuggled in against him. "You can always share my mom and dad. Plus, the Larsons pretty much think you're theirs by default. I know none of that makes up for what you lost, though. One of the worst type of hurt is what you don't really understand, huh? Just kinda whirls around in your head without having a place to go. I've never had anyone close to me die before but I remember Justin saying that Sash would go to his friend, Andi's, grave to talk to her. You could try that with your dad. He's not there how you really want him to be but there's always some chance he could still be listening. Or you could write him a letter. Maybe it hurts so bad not because he's just not there but because there's so much you need to say to him."