"No," Austin reassured him, his tone gentle, but firm with resolve. He wouldn't put Beau through this again. It had been far too much to know how much pain his husband was in to start with, and the last thing Austin wanted was for him to hurt anymore. It wasn't fair to him. "No, baby. You've been through hell more than once, and I'm not... I won't keep putting you through it. I promise. I'm so sorry, baby. That I couldn't give you the one thing you asked me for." His free hand brushed gently up and down Beau's arm, and he held tight to his husband's hand. He didn't want Beau to think that he'd never be given the chance to be free of all this pain. It wasn't fair.

The tears started coming, and Austin had tears of his own going on, too, and he very carefully reached out to brush a few of them away from Beau's cheeks. This wasn't the easiest of conversations by a longshot, and Austin knew that they'd have to repeat it a time or two because Beau wasn't really totally "with it" yet. But he'd explain it a hundred times if he had to. Because Beau deserved that much... He deserved to know why he was still living a life of pain when he could have been allowed to slip away peacefully and be done with all the hurt. "You have an infection in your heart, baby," Austin explained, his tone soft and gentle. "It's being treated, and Tara says that if you recover from that, we should be able to proceed with the bone marrow transplant. It's not a hundred percent, Beau, but you still have a chance. I know what you asked me to do, and I know that it was wrong of me not to follow your wishes. I'm sorry that I let you down. I really am. I hope that you can understand why. I'm so sorry."