Sasha Martin Stanford (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
beautifulday) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
dreamlikenewyork2017-07-28 01:10 am
beautifulday) wrote in dreamlikenewyork2017-07-28 01:10 am
"The sickness you got I can't cure."
Who: Sasha Stanford and Gen Hart
What: Fear and fatigue
Where: ICU, Mount Sinai
When: After this
“WHY ARE YOU FUCKING MAKING HIM MORE SICK? YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE HELPING HIM!” It wasn’t anger that had Sasha exploding in the middle of a hospital corridor, it was sheer terror. He didn’t understand why this was happening, and he was so terrified and panicked that Justin would die, he wasn’t coping well with anything.
It hadn’t helped that he spent the day in bed with a migraine. He was still there when Justin’s nana came through to wake him up to tell him what happened. Justin was sick. He had collapsed on stage during curtain call of the second show for the day and was rushed to hospital. His head had still been pounding, feeling like it was on fire. The pain and nausea was probably contributing to the fact he wasn’t keeping his shit together. But at the same time, how was he supposed to? Justin was in the Intensive Care Unit, unconscious, dangerously high fever, racing heartbeat and apparently had a seizure right after he collapsed.
And they were saying it was a reaction to medication? Medication they were giving him to make him better. Didn’t they know that because he had reactions in the past, that he might again? Sasha was upset, and as soon as he exploded, he broke down in tears. It was really hard to process this when his head was in so much agony, but he would have to be dead for him not to be here. He didn’t understand. He felt so useless and like he wasn’t equipped enough to understand what was happening here. He did so much learning about Justin’s illnesses and he had done everything he could to show Justin how much he loved him, regardless, but this wasn’t anything he could learn. This was something going horribly wrong, and a sickening reminder that Justin wasn’t “just mentally ill”. That could actually be life threatening, and his body underwent an onslaught of medical intervention to keep him as well as he could. But nothing was a miracle fix.
Sasha knew this, even as he broke down. Getting angry wouldn’t solve anything, but he couldn’t stop it. Unlike other times Justin was sick, he had no way of helping him here and it was awful. Justin had been in hospital since they met and started dating. He cut his wrists and tried to kill himself, and Sasha had been there for that. It was one of the hardest learning curves of his life, and he had many of those. Somewhere in amongst all this, he was suffering some sort of residual trauma about people he loved being in hospitals. Why did everyone he loved ended up seriously sick? He could see Justin in through the glass walls, attached to a multitude of wires, tubes, and machines, and he was remembering seeing his dad just like that. It was killing him that he couldn’t go in there to hug him. Despite the fact the doctor was explaining that with the right treatment, Justin would be okay… he wasn’t okay now, and complications could always happen and kill people.
Arms were soon around him and he was being led somewhere. To a seat, he realised, when he was coaxed down and his butt hit something soft. His mom was trying to get a friend to go to sit with his dad so she could come here to him at the hospital, but she wouldn’t be here yet. “He can’t die. He’s everything to me, I don’t want to lose him. He’s the best thing that ever happened to me,” he sobbed. Tears were blurring his vision and he was struggling to catch his breath because panic had his chest restricted. He realised this must be what Justin felt like any time his CPTSD was triggered or his mania escalated. Thinking that didn’t help at all. “I feel sick.”
With Justin in the best hands with Christian and his team, and Nate who was paged for joint consultation on Justin’s care, Ari had been sticking close to Sasha because he clearly was expecting the breakdown. Gen noticed this right from the start. She was terrified and stressed herself, but being a parent meant being a parent. Mark wasn’t well himself, so this was taxing, but he was doing the best he could to have his finger firmly on the pulse. It was the only way Mark could deal with anything. He wouldn’t break, not now. He would break later when Justin was as stable as he could be, and away from where his kids could see. Gen had been his wife long enough to have seen this many times. This time, she was going to be there for him when he did.
Gen helped Sasha sit down before he fell down, and Ari fetched a sick bag for him from the nurse’s station just in case. He also grabbed some tissues and a cup of water from the cooler. Sash had been bedridden all day with the migraine. Justin had been reluctant to leave him and made sure everyone was home and 1) didn’t make any noise, 2) helped him if he needed it, and 3) let him sleep. Gen didn’t get migraines herself, but Paris did. Sasha’s knocked him down hard and this was the last thing anyone would have expected. She kept her arm around Sasha, holding him while he cried. Gen was upset herself, but Sasha’s mom wasn’t here so it was her job to take care of him. That was the deal Mark made to Sasha’a parents when Sasha moved in, and Gen took it just as serious a pact as Mark did now. All the kids under their roof, she would help if they needed it. But especially Sasha, because he was Justin’s other half and an honorary son to her.
Ari mouthed to her, ‘Let me know if you need help’ and discreetly moved back over to where the doctors were talking and the hospital Social Worker had arrived to liaise. Mark made it clear that Ari was Justin’s primary Social Worker, so anything to do with his welfare while he was sick, his transition back home, and anything beyond, Ari made those calls from a social work standpoint. That was a relief for Gen, because Ari was exceptional at his job, she had witnessed how much Justin gelled with him and trusted him. It took a lot of weight off Mark’s shoulders trying to do it all alone and it also gave Justin a buffer if he didn’t want to lean entirely on his dad for everything. He was getting older now, he wanted some independence. That was why Ari was brought in in the first place.
But Gen felt like she had a lot screw up here. It was the first direct emotional interaction with Sasha… not just since she had returned, and the wedding was back on. But entirely, since Justin had met him. If she screwed this part up, Justin would get better just to tell her to fuck off and go fuck herself. She was going to just trust her instinct, and have faith in herself. Just like Mark told her too. She hugged him tighter and kissed his head, not even thinking when she then tried to smooth his curls down for him. They were unruly, but she knew Justin adored them. He was always playing with Sasha’s hair and telling him he loved it. It was adorable. She was scared and teary herself, which was okay. Her son was in a serious condition, he was very sick. “At least we know his track record of surviving is so far 100%, right?” she murmured, pressing the tissues into his hand. The cup of water was sitting beside her on the free chair. These kids were so in love, and her heart was breaking for them. Who should have to go through this shit as a teenager?
They thought what Justin had was something called Serotonin Toxicity. Because Justin had been having increased doses of a medicine by injection to stop him feeling sick and being sick, side effects from a medication they were trialling to control his cycling episodes. They warred together in his system and caused this horrible reaction, which wasn’t an allergic reaction otherwise it would have happened sooner. He had been fighting an upset stomach for about a week now. But his reactions could also mean he had something horrible like Meningitis, so they were running a whole bunch of tests and no one was allowed in to see him until he was cleared of everything infectious. He hated this so much for Justin. He hated that he was so sick and no one had a perfect way to help him, he hated that he had to suffer. He wanted to take it all away for him. Sasha nodded, but it was accompanied by another sob. “Yeah, but he doesn’t always know how to fight. What if he doesn’t want to wake up?”
“He’ll wake up for you, sweetie. If I know my boy the way I do, there is no way he’ll stick like that any longer than he needs to knowing you’ll be terrified for him. He’s been well mentally this week, even if he hasn’t been feeling good. I’ve been seeing him get back on top of this. He won’t quit this, he’s too much of a fighter. And you’re part of the reason he wants to fight now,” Gen reminded him. She watched Mark in deep discussion with Christian and Nate, Ari standing by listening so he was in the loop. She had to wonder if Ari was shaken too, but he was so good at his job, he was the master in cool collected poker face. But he had gotten close to Justin, so it had to be upsetting him. “Is this tough for you, honey? Being at the hospital after losing Andi?”
Sasha closed his eyes, tears dripping from his lashes. He didn’t really have the strength to switch off the deluge. They were just as much because he was upset and worried about Justin as they were because of pain. Stress made his migraines worse, but he had to be here. Even if he had to lie in a corner with a blanket over his head, he wasn’t leaving. He nodded, only as much that it didn’t kill his head. “But it’s okay. Even if this whole place triggered me into a breakdown, I would still be here for him. It won’t. I don’t like it, and the smells remind me of Andi and Dad, but you don’t love someone halfway. You love them through all the good, and just as much through the bad. If it’s mutual and no one is overpowering anyone else, then it’s the only way to face life. He just… he makes me so happy. I never knew anyone could make me feel so right and so special beyond my closest friends for family. I didn’t know this love thing. Not until I met him and all these rush of feelings hit me. I wish he didn’t have to be in so much pain. I want to take it all away for him.”
Gen took some of the tissues and softly dabbed Sasha’s cheeks with them, and then she offered him the cup of water to sip on. He was so upset, he was all blotchy and sweaty. “We would all join forces and take it from him in a heartbeat if we could, darling. This is so fucking hard, because you’re growing up and you’re capable of caring for each other, but at the same time, you’re too young to need all of these knocks. Being here for him is all that matters, but once we know what’s going on, if you’re still not feeling well, will you consider going home to rest? He would want to know you’re okay. He doesn’t like seeing you in pain either. I know you’re probably going to say no, but if you need to, you just give us the word, okay? You know, I know we didn’t know each other well in London, but I saw how much you brightened that light up in him again when we were all so fearful he had lost it for good. It was such a beautiful thing to see. You put all us adults to shame.”
Sasha sipped the water, because the icy cold was a relief in his mouth. Anything that could soothe the sensory overload of a migraine, he would try. He didn’t want to go home. He had to know first that Justin was going to be okay. “That was the best time of my life. Making memories with him is my favourite thing in the world. I love feeling him holding my hand, and I love the way he pulls me into these squeezing hugs. It didn’t take long for me to realise why Reecy calls him smooshie,” he added with a little weak laugh through the tears. “He feels so right close to me, and I love his kisses. And I know he’s right there, but I miss him and it fucking hurts.”
Justin’s hugs were notorious and anyone who had been on the receiving end of them knew that when that wind was knocked out of his sails with his illness, it was extremely painful for him. Take away the sickness and trauma, and he would pretty much just always be a content and affectionate kid. Just like he was on his good days. She was so proud he was letting her call him her son again, and letting her be his mom. They were in the healing phase, but there had been that breakthrough where she revealed to him that she and Mark had set the wedding date, and the fact he let her care for him when he was sick was huge. Very few people got into his personal space when he was sick, because the fortress of emotional walls went up around him. “Of course you do, sweetheart. You’re used to having him close now. He’s part of you, he’s part of your day, every day. This part is the worst of the worst, because you have to stand back and leave him in the hands of the doctors. You don’t know if they’ll care for him as well as you do, but they will. Christian is just as wonderful a doctor as Nate, and they both know him. They’re both exceptional in their fields, there’s no one better to care for him. What’s been your favourite memory with him?”
“The day I met him. All the memories are special, but my life changed that day. I knew a lot about him because I was a fan, and Andi was pretty convinced I was a total fanboy. I was, but I just didn’t realise it. No matter how much I had read about him, or knew what he dealt with, he still completely took me by surprised. Shit, I was so nervous. Nervous that I was wasting his time, and even if he was doing it as part of the wish arrangement, he would just do the thing and that was it. Like, I assumed he did a whole lot of them or something. It was nothing like that. He listened to me, and he wanted to talk to me. He was open with me. I saw him across the theatre up on stage, and it was like, yep, he looks like the superstar I’m supposed to be meeting. Just like all the pictures and the YouTube videos. Only, you’re right… the light wasn’t quite there. Not at first. He looked tired, and then when he asked me to come up to him and we sat together, I remember how beautiful his eyes were and I remember how softly spoken he was. With that adorable mix of Aussie and Southern accent. I was already fascinated, but then to hear him sing right beside me there, and hearing the power in his voice, how different it was from his soft tone, it was like a clue that there was a lot more to him than met the eye. But I never thought in that moment I would ever be privy to it. That never even crossed my mind.” Out of habit, Sasha checked his phone, looking for messages from Justin, even if that was completely irrational. He put it back in his pocket and instead started to shred a tissue anxiously. “When he took care of me after Andi’s death too. No matter how much you think you’re prepared for a death, you never are. I didn’t cope at all, but I know that him wanting to be there for me, I managed better than I ever would have. Sometimes, even, I feel like she knew he was a guardian angel or something. It all feels like kismet. I don’t know. Maybe I’m just being dumb. I’m tired…”
Gen dropped a small kiss to the top of his head. “It’s not dumb. It’s beautiful. In the short time you’ve been together, you’ve been through so much. That’s why you’ll get through this. But now, it hurts and you’re struggling. It’s okay. We don’t have to keep talking, sweetie. Why don’t I ask the nurse for a spare pillow and you can lie down on the bench here and get some rest? I’ll stay right here with you until your mom arrives.”
Sasha was exhausted. His words had become tired mumbles and he kept putting his hand to his head. Soon, she had the pillow and a blanket, and he was lying across the bench with his head on the pillow in her lap while they waited on news of Justin’s condition. Suddenly, she knew exactly what Mark meant when he said Sasha was like another son to him now. Because he and Sasha were a package deal. Justin couldn’t be here to care for his boyfriend right now, so that defaulted to them. Inside, Gen was aching with pain for her boy. She wanted her dad, she wanted Paris, she wanted her mom, she wanted Mark. She wanted to hug them all and tell them over and over how much she loved them. And she would, just as soon as she knew her boy was out of danger.
COMPLETE
What: Fear and fatigue
Where: ICU, Mount Sinai
When: After this
“WHY ARE YOU FUCKING MAKING HIM MORE SICK? YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE HELPING HIM!” It wasn’t anger that had Sasha exploding in the middle of a hospital corridor, it was sheer terror. He didn’t understand why this was happening, and he was so terrified and panicked that Justin would die, he wasn’t coping well with anything.
It hadn’t helped that he spent the day in bed with a migraine. He was still there when Justin’s nana came through to wake him up to tell him what happened. Justin was sick. He had collapsed on stage during curtain call of the second show for the day and was rushed to hospital. His head had still been pounding, feeling like it was on fire. The pain and nausea was probably contributing to the fact he wasn’t keeping his shit together. But at the same time, how was he supposed to? Justin was in the Intensive Care Unit, unconscious, dangerously high fever, racing heartbeat and apparently had a seizure right after he collapsed.
And they were saying it was a reaction to medication? Medication they were giving him to make him better. Didn’t they know that because he had reactions in the past, that he might again? Sasha was upset, and as soon as he exploded, he broke down in tears. It was really hard to process this when his head was in so much agony, but he would have to be dead for him not to be here. He didn’t understand. He felt so useless and like he wasn’t equipped enough to understand what was happening here. He did so much learning about Justin’s illnesses and he had done everything he could to show Justin how much he loved him, regardless, but this wasn’t anything he could learn. This was something going horribly wrong, and a sickening reminder that Justin wasn’t “just mentally ill”. That could actually be life threatening, and his body underwent an onslaught of medical intervention to keep him as well as he could. But nothing was a miracle fix.
Sasha knew this, even as he broke down. Getting angry wouldn’t solve anything, but he couldn’t stop it. Unlike other times Justin was sick, he had no way of helping him here and it was awful. Justin had been in hospital since they met and started dating. He cut his wrists and tried to kill himself, and Sasha had been there for that. It was one of the hardest learning curves of his life, and he had many of those. Somewhere in amongst all this, he was suffering some sort of residual trauma about people he loved being in hospitals. Why did everyone he loved ended up seriously sick? He could see Justin in through the glass walls, attached to a multitude of wires, tubes, and machines, and he was remembering seeing his dad just like that. It was killing him that he couldn’t go in there to hug him. Despite the fact the doctor was explaining that with the right treatment, Justin would be okay… he wasn’t okay now, and complications could always happen and kill people.
Arms were soon around him and he was being led somewhere. To a seat, he realised, when he was coaxed down and his butt hit something soft. His mom was trying to get a friend to go to sit with his dad so she could come here to him at the hospital, but she wouldn’t be here yet. “He can’t die. He’s everything to me, I don’t want to lose him. He’s the best thing that ever happened to me,” he sobbed. Tears were blurring his vision and he was struggling to catch his breath because panic had his chest restricted. He realised this must be what Justin felt like any time his CPTSD was triggered or his mania escalated. Thinking that didn’t help at all. “I feel sick.”
With Justin in the best hands with Christian and his team, and Nate who was paged for joint consultation on Justin’s care, Ari had been sticking close to Sasha because he clearly was expecting the breakdown. Gen noticed this right from the start. She was terrified and stressed herself, but being a parent meant being a parent. Mark wasn’t well himself, so this was taxing, but he was doing the best he could to have his finger firmly on the pulse. It was the only way Mark could deal with anything. He wouldn’t break, not now. He would break later when Justin was as stable as he could be, and away from where his kids could see. Gen had been his wife long enough to have seen this many times. This time, she was going to be there for him when he did.
Gen helped Sasha sit down before he fell down, and Ari fetched a sick bag for him from the nurse’s station just in case. He also grabbed some tissues and a cup of water from the cooler. Sash had been bedridden all day with the migraine. Justin had been reluctant to leave him and made sure everyone was home and 1) didn’t make any noise, 2) helped him if he needed it, and 3) let him sleep. Gen didn’t get migraines herself, but Paris did. Sasha’s knocked him down hard and this was the last thing anyone would have expected. She kept her arm around Sasha, holding him while he cried. Gen was upset herself, but Sasha’s mom wasn’t here so it was her job to take care of him. That was the deal Mark made to Sasha’a parents when Sasha moved in, and Gen took it just as serious a pact as Mark did now. All the kids under their roof, she would help if they needed it. But especially Sasha, because he was Justin’s other half and an honorary son to her.
Ari mouthed to her, ‘Let me know if you need help’ and discreetly moved back over to where the doctors were talking and the hospital Social Worker had arrived to liaise. Mark made it clear that Ari was Justin’s primary Social Worker, so anything to do with his welfare while he was sick, his transition back home, and anything beyond, Ari made those calls from a social work standpoint. That was a relief for Gen, because Ari was exceptional at his job, she had witnessed how much Justin gelled with him and trusted him. It took a lot of weight off Mark’s shoulders trying to do it all alone and it also gave Justin a buffer if he didn’t want to lean entirely on his dad for everything. He was getting older now, he wanted some independence. That was why Ari was brought in in the first place.
But Gen felt like she had a lot screw up here. It was the first direct emotional interaction with Sasha… not just since she had returned, and the wedding was back on. But entirely, since Justin had met him. If she screwed this part up, Justin would get better just to tell her to fuck off and go fuck herself. She was going to just trust her instinct, and have faith in herself. Just like Mark told her too. She hugged him tighter and kissed his head, not even thinking when she then tried to smooth his curls down for him. They were unruly, but she knew Justin adored them. He was always playing with Sasha’s hair and telling him he loved it. It was adorable. She was scared and teary herself, which was okay. Her son was in a serious condition, he was very sick. “At least we know his track record of surviving is so far 100%, right?” she murmured, pressing the tissues into his hand. The cup of water was sitting beside her on the free chair. These kids were so in love, and her heart was breaking for them. Who should have to go through this shit as a teenager?
They thought what Justin had was something called Serotonin Toxicity. Because Justin had been having increased doses of a medicine by injection to stop him feeling sick and being sick, side effects from a medication they were trialling to control his cycling episodes. They warred together in his system and caused this horrible reaction, which wasn’t an allergic reaction otherwise it would have happened sooner. He had been fighting an upset stomach for about a week now. But his reactions could also mean he had something horrible like Meningitis, so they were running a whole bunch of tests and no one was allowed in to see him until he was cleared of everything infectious. He hated this so much for Justin. He hated that he was so sick and no one had a perfect way to help him, he hated that he had to suffer. He wanted to take it all away for him. Sasha nodded, but it was accompanied by another sob. “Yeah, but he doesn’t always know how to fight. What if he doesn’t want to wake up?”
“He’ll wake up for you, sweetie. If I know my boy the way I do, there is no way he’ll stick like that any longer than he needs to knowing you’ll be terrified for him. He’s been well mentally this week, even if he hasn’t been feeling good. I’ve been seeing him get back on top of this. He won’t quit this, he’s too much of a fighter. And you’re part of the reason he wants to fight now,” Gen reminded him. She watched Mark in deep discussion with Christian and Nate, Ari standing by listening so he was in the loop. She had to wonder if Ari was shaken too, but he was so good at his job, he was the master in cool collected poker face. But he had gotten close to Justin, so it had to be upsetting him. “Is this tough for you, honey? Being at the hospital after losing Andi?”
Sasha closed his eyes, tears dripping from his lashes. He didn’t really have the strength to switch off the deluge. They were just as much because he was upset and worried about Justin as they were because of pain. Stress made his migraines worse, but he had to be here. Even if he had to lie in a corner with a blanket over his head, he wasn’t leaving. He nodded, only as much that it didn’t kill his head. “But it’s okay. Even if this whole place triggered me into a breakdown, I would still be here for him. It won’t. I don’t like it, and the smells remind me of Andi and Dad, but you don’t love someone halfway. You love them through all the good, and just as much through the bad. If it’s mutual and no one is overpowering anyone else, then it’s the only way to face life. He just… he makes me so happy. I never knew anyone could make me feel so right and so special beyond my closest friends for family. I didn’t know this love thing. Not until I met him and all these rush of feelings hit me. I wish he didn’t have to be in so much pain. I want to take it all away for him.”
Gen took some of the tissues and softly dabbed Sasha’s cheeks with them, and then she offered him the cup of water to sip on. He was so upset, he was all blotchy and sweaty. “We would all join forces and take it from him in a heartbeat if we could, darling. This is so fucking hard, because you’re growing up and you’re capable of caring for each other, but at the same time, you’re too young to need all of these knocks. Being here for him is all that matters, but once we know what’s going on, if you’re still not feeling well, will you consider going home to rest? He would want to know you’re okay. He doesn’t like seeing you in pain either. I know you’re probably going to say no, but if you need to, you just give us the word, okay? You know, I know we didn’t know each other well in London, but I saw how much you brightened that light up in him again when we were all so fearful he had lost it for good. It was such a beautiful thing to see. You put all us adults to shame.”
Sasha sipped the water, because the icy cold was a relief in his mouth. Anything that could soothe the sensory overload of a migraine, he would try. He didn’t want to go home. He had to know first that Justin was going to be okay. “That was the best time of my life. Making memories with him is my favourite thing in the world. I love feeling him holding my hand, and I love the way he pulls me into these squeezing hugs. It didn’t take long for me to realise why Reecy calls him smooshie,” he added with a little weak laugh through the tears. “He feels so right close to me, and I love his kisses. And I know he’s right there, but I miss him and it fucking hurts.”
Justin’s hugs were notorious and anyone who had been on the receiving end of them knew that when that wind was knocked out of his sails with his illness, it was extremely painful for him. Take away the sickness and trauma, and he would pretty much just always be a content and affectionate kid. Just like he was on his good days. She was so proud he was letting her call him her son again, and letting her be his mom. They were in the healing phase, but there had been that breakthrough where she revealed to him that she and Mark had set the wedding date, and the fact he let her care for him when he was sick was huge. Very few people got into his personal space when he was sick, because the fortress of emotional walls went up around him. “Of course you do, sweetheart. You’re used to having him close now. He’s part of you, he’s part of your day, every day. This part is the worst of the worst, because you have to stand back and leave him in the hands of the doctors. You don’t know if they’ll care for him as well as you do, but they will. Christian is just as wonderful a doctor as Nate, and they both know him. They’re both exceptional in their fields, there’s no one better to care for him. What’s been your favourite memory with him?”
“The day I met him. All the memories are special, but my life changed that day. I knew a lot about him because I was a fan, and Andi was pretty convinced I was a total fanboy. I was, but I just didn’t realise it. No matter how much I had read about him, or knew what he dealt with, he still completely took me by surprised. Shit, I was so nervous. Nervous that I was wasting his time, and even if he was doing it as part of the wish arrangement, he would just do the thing and that was it. Like, I assumed he did a whole lot of them or something. It was nothing like that. He listened to me, and he wanted to talk to me. He was open with me. I saw him across the theatre up on stage, and it was like, yep, he looks like the superstar I’m supposed to be meeting. Just like all the pictures and the YouTube videos. Only, you’re right… the light wasn’t quite there. Not at first. He looked tired, and then when he asked me to come up to him and we sat together, I remember how beautiful his eyes were and I remember how softly spoken he was. With that adorable mix of Aussie and Southern accent. I was already fascinated, but then to hear him sing right beside me there, and hearing the power in his voice, how different it was from his soft tone, it was like a clue that there was a lot more to him than met the eye. But I never thought in that moment I would ever be privy to it. That never even crossed my mind.” Out of habit, Sasha checked his phone, looking for messages from Justin, even if that was completely irrational. He put it back in his pocket and instead started to shred a tissue anxiously. “When he took care of me after Andi’s death too. No matter how much you think you’re prepared for a death, you never are. I didn’t cope at all, but I know that him wanting to be there for me, I managed better than I ever would have. Sometimes, even, I feel like she knew he was a guardian angel or something. It all feels like kismet. I don’t know. Maybe I’m just being dumb. I’m tired…”
Gen dropped a small kiss to the top of his head. “It’s not dumb. It’s beautiful. In the short time you’ve been together, you’ve been through so much. That’s why you’ll get through this. But now, it hurts and you’re struggling. It’s okay. We don’t have to keep talking, sweetie. Why don’t I ask the nurse for a spare pillow and you can lie down on the bench here and get some rest? I’ll stay right here with you until your mom arrives.”
Sasha was exhausted. His words had become tired mumbles and he kept putting his hand to his head. Soon, she had the pillow and a blanket, and he was lying across the bench with his head on the pillow in her lap while they waited on news of Justin’s condition. Suddenly, she knew exactly what Mark meant when he said Sasha was like another son to him now. Because he and Sasha were a package deal. Justin couldn’t be here to care for his boyfriend right now, so that defaulted to them. Inside, Gen was aching with pain for her boy. She wanted her dad, she wanted Paris, she wanted her mom, she wanted Mark. She wanted to hug them all and tell them over and over how much she loved them. And she would, just as soon as she knew her boy was out of danger.
COMPLETE