aussielawyer: (084)
Mark Thomas Campbell, esq. ([personal profile] aussielawyer) wrote in [community profile] dreamlikenewyork2013-10-27 05:49 pm
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Rude awakenings.
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asskickingblahniks: (006)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 06:57 am (UTC)(link)
You realize being on FB probably isn't really helping matters right now, right?

But in all seriousness, babe, we've gotta get you back to bed. You woke up shivery and sweaty all at once.
aussielawyer: (- 090)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 06:59 am (UTC)(link)
No, no. I think I'm feeling better now. I never get sick.
asskickingblahniks: (019)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 07:01 am (UTC)(link)
You threw up again like 3 minutes ago. I timed it. You're not magically well. You really need to lie down. You're worrying me.
aussielawyer: (066)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 07:04 am (UTC)(link)
Jesus, why is Justin up? He was practically snoring when I checked on him. I think it was just nothing. Just stress or something.
asskickingblahniks: (003)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 07:07 am (UTC)(link)
Just stress, huh? Stress gives you fevers, does it? Sweetie, you would've woken the dead earlier. I hate to break it to you, but you're sick. It's Sunday, and you're not going to the office today, and neither am I. So please lie down?
aussielawyer: (041)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 07:19 am (UTC)(link)
It's not really a fever, though. It's okay, I'll just have some water. Really, I'm feeling better. Sort of. At least, I will soon, I know it.
asskickingblahniks: (037)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 07:37 am (UTC)(link)
Baby, I felt your forehead earlier. You're burning up. And water probably won't hurt, but you may not be able to keep it down. Honey, you're sick. Just lie down and I'll get you some Pepto and some more blankets.
aussielawyer: (047)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 07:41 am (UTC)(link)
Wait, is Justin okay? He's feeling okay, isn't he? You have to make sure he takes his pills.
asskickingblahniks: (014)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 07:45 am (UTC)(link)
He's all right at the moment. I'm keeping an eye on him, too, okay? He doesn't seem to be ill. Just to think that your sudden illness is morning sickness, since I have apparently knocked you up. :P
aussielawyer: (062)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 07:48 am (UTC)(link)
No, no more kids. My heart won't take it. Or my... whatever orifice a baby is supposed to come out of. Oh god, now I really do feel ill.
asskickingblahniks: (051)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 08:02 am (UTC)(link)
Never say never, honeybunch. :P But I don't think you'd ever be the same if you gave birth. Seriously, sweetheart, get your ass in bed or I'll drag you myself, and I don't think you're strong enough to fight me on it today.
aussielawyer: (025)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 08:07 am (UTC)(link)
I'm sure it's probably nothing though. Shit, it's really hot in here. Why did you turn the heating up? I have to get up before 9, though. I've got stuff to do.
asskickingblahniks: (035)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 08:19 am (UTC)(link)
I haven't touched the heat, baby. And you're not getting up or going anywhere today, and possibly not tomorrow either. Do not make me call Ali. Because I will.
aussielawyer: (056)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 08:21 am (UTC)(link)
No, Christ. She's pregnant and you two would be terrifying together. You can't have my balls. My son's life depends on them... somehow.
asskickingblahniks: (088)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 08:23 am (UTC)(link)
I don't need to keep your balls, babe... I actually like them attached to you where they belong. But I don't want to have to hurt them for you to keep your ass in bed. And your son's life only depended on them for it's creation... From that point on, he really has no need for them to stick around. LOL
aussielawyer: (003)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 08:25 am (UTC)(link)
That's mean. I need to keep them so I can show him why he needs to keep his own bits wrapped.
asskickingblahniks: (092)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 08:28 am (UTC)(link)
He's gay, so I think his reasons and your reasons for keeping the bits wrapped are different anyway. But don't change the subject. I swear to god, if you're not in the bed by the time I get back with the pepto, I'll bitchslap you.
aussielawyer: (026)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 08:32 am (UTC)(link)
On the upside? He's clean. They did a HIV test when he was first ill. So, I'm proud of him. Do I get a reprieve if I'm stuck in the bathroom?
asskickingblahniks: (092)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 09:59 am (UTC)(link)
Well, thank fuck for that. If you're stuck in the bathroom, yes. If you're using that as an excuse and trying to lawyer your way out of things, I will bitchslap you twice.

And the bathroom at your office does NOT count.
aussielawyer: (010)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 10:06 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, but I have... things... and stuff... and shit to do. I'm not really that sick.
asskickingblahniks: (046)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 10:54 am (UTC)(link)
Things and stuff and shit? Really, babe? If you're not in our bathroom being sick, you had damn well better be in bed. That's the end of discussion. I know you're a lawyer, but I grew up with a sassy gay bitch for a baby brother, only to become business partners with him, so don't think I can't hold my own in an argument.
aussielawyer: (040)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 10:57 am (UTC)(link)
I'm working up to getting to the bedroom. I really am. It's a work-in-progress. It's a really big apartment we live in. We should downsize.
asskickingblahniks: (087)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 11:01 am (UTC)(link)
Quaint little studio in the Village, maybe? They're en vogue right now. I'm coming to get you, babe.
aussielawyer: (035)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 11:10 am (UTC)(link)
That won't work. I want my kid to know he can wank whenever he feels like it and I won't be there telling him it will make him go blind or something.
asskickingblahniks: (013)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 11:12 am (UTC)(link)
Okay, fine. No studio. How about we keep this apartment, and you just let me help you to our room and bring you a trash can for if you need it?
aussielawyer: (054)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 11:16 am (UTC)(link)
I'm not that sick. Let's try tea. That's my phone ringing, I need to get that.

Or you could be really awesome and bring it to me.
asskickingblahniks: (076)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 11:21 am (UTC)(link)
That's a work call, and you don't need to get it. I've called Ash already. You're not going anywhere.
aussielawyer: (033)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 11:24 am (UTC)(link)
Noooo. Damnit. What did you tell him? Justin will get it for me. He's the nice one.
asskickingblahniks: (014)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 11:28 am (UTC)(link)
That you're not feeling well today and if you come into the office, he's on strict orders to call me right away. But that won't be necessary. I need to run into the office myself for a couple of hours, but you won't be going anywhere.
aussielawyer: (015)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 11:30 am (UTC)(link)
Justin and me? I can deal with that. Leave him with lots of sanitizer.
asskickingblahniks: (035)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 11:32 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, hell no. I've got a Markysitter.
aussielawyer: (070)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 11:34 am (UTC)(link)
I don't need that. I'm fine. I have to take Justin to buy him a new phone.
asskickingblahniks: (089)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 11:36 am (UTC)(link)
I'll pick up a new phone for Justin on my way home. And don't piss the Markysitter off. You won't like the results if you do.
aussielawyer: (004)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 11:38 am (UTC)(link)
You can't do this after we found a song. We're supposed to be having a lot of sex.
asskickingblahniks: (037)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 12:13 pm (UTC)(link)
If you have sex with me right now, I might get puked on. I don't like my odds here, honeybunch. I love you. But no sex until you've gone 48 hours without puking. And don't lie to me. I'll know.
aussielawyer: (010)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 12:19 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't feel sex right now.
asskickingblahniks: (039)

[personal profile] asskickingblahniks 2013-10-27 12:21 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, at least there's that battle won. Bathroom and bed for you until further notice.
likefatherlikeson: (027)

[personal profile] likefatherlikeson 2013-10-27 10:21 am (UTC)(link)
Are you okay, Dad?
aussielawyer: (030)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 10:22 am (UTC)(link)
It's all good, mate. I'll be fine. You should get some rest, yeah?
likefatherlikeson: (074)

[personal profile] likefatherlikeson 2013-10-27 10:24 am (UTC)(link)
Did I make you sick?
aussielawyer: (049)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 10:25 am (UTC)(link)
Of course you didn't, kiddo. What makes you think that?
likefatherlikeson: (099)

[personal profile] likefatherlikeson 2013-10-27 10:41 am (UTC)(link)
Because you probably haven't had a good night sleep since I got here. Dad, you're the best thing that ever happened to me, and I didn't mean any of that stuff I said to you. I'm really sorry.
aussielawyer: (037)

[personal profile] aussielawyer 2013-10-27 10:45 am (UTC)(link)
Hey, hey... Jus, buddy, it's okay. You haven't made me sick. Come on, kiddo, don't get upset. There's no need to be upset. I know you didn't mean it. Come here and give me a hug. You'll see I'm okay.
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